Yesterday we decided we would go to a shopping centre further than ones close to home. That centre has bigger shops and more variety. This is the start of our fable of privilege.
At bed time I didn’t bother setting the alarm on my iPhone like I do when I have an early start. Ingrid and I planned to get as much sleep as we could. We hadn’t planned it but decided what time we were leaving when we were both up.
I just got back to the office from the ‘holidays’. I knew there were a lot of important and urgent things awaiting. I successfully resisted the urge to work and tried to focus on building a reserve of strength I’d need when I got back.
As I imagined things are as I had imagined. At the start of the year and I’ve already used, “hectic” as a response and punctuation. Time and excellence are of the essence!
I’m kinda slow in learning some things. Marriage is probably one of the most significant achievements for me… In the sense of the work it takes and that it is an exercise for the rest of our lives. Jenny Acuff gives an easy tip to create momentum in marriage. Check out her tip here.
Too many crimes are committed in the name of honesty and truth. Some people claim to be very open people because they always speak the truth. They claim they are honest in dealing with people when they don’t like something.
That is what they say. There are times I may have also used their language. Rather, they’re excuses.
Often it is just a cover for being nasty. Mean. Stop giving honesty and being truthful a bad rap because of your meanness.
I’m not suggesting that we never speak the truth. I’m saying we must be careful how we speak the truth.
We must be honest with people but it matters how we translate that honesty in the context. Care enough about your message to package it well.
Also, don’t mistake being rude for being honest with people. That makes you worse than a jerk. As I encounter people who do such, I write these things as notes to myself.
There are many opportunities to be a jerk. The question is, “Will I take them?” [Click to Tweet]
I know that I can be just as bad. You too. I’d like to think that I can’t be as bad as everyone else but that is not the truth. Sometimes I do cross the “jerk line”.
I’m glad to have people around me that love me enough to pull me back over that line without being nasty but truthful in a kind way. It hurts, sometimes, but it helps. I end up a better person. These people help me become more.
I want to be honest about how I feel with people I care about and leave relationships intact. In fact, I want, I need the relationships to be stronger. I want people I lead to love me for the truth I bleed, with love.
“I’m just saying the truth” or “I’m just being honest” must not be used, as a cop out for not delivering the truth in a way it deserves.
Truth is a beautiful thing. It deserves to be delivered in a manner that exalts not demeans it [Click to Tweet]
Truth is like a hammer. If it is used well it can build great things. It can also be used destructively. We get to choose how we use it.
Love people and truth enough to use it to build up; not destroy [Click to Tweet]
When you’re done using truth, the hammer, may be there more standing and not rubble.
Honesty strengthens the foundations of relationships, don’t deface it.
After founding a church and leading it for the past 20 years I learned:
God has a purpose for everyone!
We are all leaders:
God’s purpose thrusts us all into leadership. Everyone influences someone; thus we are all leaders.
Always encourage people to lead:
As a leader, my responsibility and privilege is to respect every person, irrespective of age or gender, and to inspire them to lead in life.
My family is my responsibility:
When it comes to priorities, family is the first arena of leadership. It carries the most profound consequences to a person’s joy and a sense of significance.
Most people are not thinking as much about you as you think:
Among those you lead, some will love you, most will like you and few will criticize, oppose and resist you. Be grateful for those who love and support you, be gracious to those who like you and don’t worry nor waste any energy or time on the others.
Hold people lightly:
People come and people go. They are God’s children not mine!
Never be a threatened leader:
Encourage people to make decisions, show initiative, take responsibility and lead. No one can threaten my job or position, as I don’t have a job. I have a call from God and there is more than enough for all of us to do.
When I do what I can do for His Glory then He will do what only He can do, and that makes all the difference.
Church leaders often complain they are tired and feel used. But they forget that when we met Jesus and were consumed with His love, grace & mercy for us we prayed, “Lord use me”. Stop weeping and start sweeping, serving, and leading!